Questions on Thoughts Relating to Clear Sight

[ClarkNight]

(11-09-2014 07:29 PM)Sunrise Wrote:  Some things I've wondered about:

On Black:

I want to know more about black. How black IS black? I don't mean as black as printer's ink, or black velvet, or the blackest black you ever saw. I mean where is it? I remember when I was about four being amazed at how BLACK it looked when you closed your eyes even when the room was brilliant with sunshine. I didn't note where or why or how it was, just that it was, but now I wonder, did I see the light of the sun besides? It seemed so deeply peaceful, restful, like something wonderful, but I guess it just left without my notice of its departure. When I close my eyes now, I don't see black. If it's bright I see brightness, if it's dark I see dimness. Not black. Mostly I see a grayish shade, which is definitely not total black. When I palm (something I have never enjoyed) I can't imagine much more than a tiny pinprick of total black, and that comes and goes. However somewhere - I can't find it at the moment, I thought Dr. Bates said that those with perfect sight see black at all times. WHERE? How can one see black when one's eyes are open? I can't. Especially if it's supposed to be in your mind, not the world around you. And it can't be that it only comes when you aren't looking for it because I don't see it whether I look for it or not. Besides, when I was four, I didn't look for it, or not. It just was, although I don't remember if it was there when my eyes were open. I want to see this black again! Will it come in time? Does it only come with 20/20 vision? I wish it would come by degrees at least!

On the same subject, and regarding black and pain, is it really possible for someone to see a dark enough black that has the ability to ease pain? How could the boy in the example he gave have gotten through surgery without losing black once? - and were his eyes open or closed? (I mean, would it be more likely if one's eyes were open or closed, because there's probably no way of knowing if that boy's were). I have a certain reason that I am interested in this possibility, but if I even have a headache, thinking of the color black in any shade I can see (on an object for instance) or imagine, does not lessen the intensity of the pain, so how could he possibly go through a whole operation and have no pain?

On Palming and Visualization (or visualization of any sort):

How does someone who can't, make things move? Or should I say, have things move. I don't mean by force. When I try to imagine a scene, I quickly give up. See the birds flying? They are still as if painted to the sky. The breeze does not move the leaves, nor do the leaves float to the ground, and the boat is apparently stuck in mud. If I put myself in the scene and try to walk it is an exercise in frustration. Nothing passes like I was walking in actual life. I might as well be trying to step into a painting of a scene, thinking I can really get in it. Sometimes, if I've been in a car I can get the feeling of movement while driving, but I never did have much luck with the telephone pole visualization where you were supposed to imagine you were riding in a car or train and count the poles as they went by. Even when I was ten or eleven they just didn't MOVE! Or more precisely, the car or train didn't. It doesn't help that I really can't clearly visualize even a still object. I can start - say with an apple, but then I can't remember the details of an apple despite having seen, I'm sure, at least a hundred thousand apples in my life. Only a very few things I can remember clearly - say a toy I remember from years ago, or one or two particular flowers, but even them, I can't hold for long - and I don't mean to stare at, I mean to look from place to place on without losing the image in my mind.

On Reading:

What EXACTLY is the correct way to read? I've seen lots of articles on this. You have the picture that says you are supposed to shift from word to word all over your reading material. I guess that comes in time - long time for me - but if I shift my poor eyes here, there and back again, I have no idea what I'm reading. I think I'm doing something wrong - and then again, I start to rush. Some say you're supposed to read along the bottom of the letters, others say in a straight line right through the middle all the while seeing, if you can, the white behind. Yes, I can see the white glow, but it hasn't improved my sight. I was quite impressed by the lady who painted her way around all the letters with imaginary white paint and saw perfectly since, but when I tried that, I didn't (obviously) have such good results. I've looked at a page of writing for a long long time many times from an unseeing distance and looked at only the white or back and forth, but only rarely did I ever get a clear view of what I was supposed to be seeing, and it never stayed clear from that distance from then on. I've also heard of taking a black piece of paper and cutting a slit in it the size of your line of print and going down the lines one by one, letter by letter, making sure you read only one letter at a time. I'm not sure if I'd be soon be understanding anything that way either, and I didn't try that, but if that's the proper way, I can try. Meanwhile others say you aren't supposed to focus on only one letter at a time, you're supposed to look at more than one. So for any confused readers who, like me, read a lot, what is the proper way, in the most detail you can give, to read that will improve sight and keep it that way?

On The Inability To See Beyond A Few Inches:

It is the one thing that quickly stops me from taking off my glasses for long periods of time. I can read a book okay with my nose on it, but a newspaper is more annoying. I can draw small objects without trouble, but then I want to see more of the whole page. If I am filing something, it greatly slows down progress when I have no clue what I'm filing at a glance. The same for the computer. The screen is about 14 inches away and can't be brought closer and while I can put my nose on it to read, I can't type anything or make much use of the mouse that way. And it isn't a laptop so I can't move it back and forth - or move it back a little at a time like some people have suggested. However I've heard that it only worsens your eyes to hang your head (and back) over the book, desk, or table. The paper from my behavioral vision specialist specifically said not to do this. So how can I improve quickly to see to about 14 or 16 inches away? Then I'm sure I could go without glasses much of the time. Also without glasses on, I notice it takes a LOT longer to do anything. If it takes an hour to type out something that should have taken twenty minutes, that is not very helpful. I am wearing my glasses to type this out, and it's already taking me a long time, but at least everything is spelled correctly, and I can read what I'm typing. Not that I wouldn't prefer to do it without them.

On Close Versus Far Improvement as Well as On Words and Numbers:

Why does it seem (at least with myopia, and for me) like it's easier to see something (such as words) in the distance in a sudden clear flash, than it is to see something close up suddenly very well? I always look for the words around. Is it not good to look for words and numbers? After all, if I think I suddenly see more clearly and then I look at a letter or number, I usually feel otherwise, but if I see a word or a number suddenly more clearly, then everything seems more clear. But no matter how clearly I think I see, including on my own eye chart, the eye doctor's (that's the opthamologist) eye chart always convinces him otherwise - and I usually can barely read even the largest letters when I am there - and that is WITH my glasses on (and most definitely without - not that they ever let me try without) - even if on the way there I saw a lot of distant words quite well, or at least readably without them. However the COPD seemed to think I was focusing too much on these words (the ability to see the clock for instance) and maybe I do zero in on words and numbers too quickly. Still, I look for other things too.

I guess that is enough for now. Thank you for any insight and all your help.

Hi Sunrise. I am reading your post and will create a audio-video response and upload here soon.